


Distraction

by luca_kieran



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: All The Ships, AsaNoya - Freeform, Awkward Kageyama Tobio, Crack, Gen, Hinata Shouyou & Kozume Kenma Friendship, Hinata Shouyou is a Dork, KageHina - Freeform, KuroKen - Freeform, M/M, Multi, also pls forgive me, and starts something he wasn't prepared for, background kiyoyachi, background ukatake, background yakulev - Freeform, but not ridiculous, daisuga - Freeform, every ship is mentioned, everyone is dating everyone - Freeform, he is a Mess, hinata shoyou is a ray of sunshine, im not hyper into haikyuu, im trying pls, iwaoi - Freeform, kenma says a lot, kuroo is trying his best, not all characters present though, oikawa is a brat, so if i mess up names just let me live ok, someone help asahi, suga can't help himself, tanaka and noya blur the lines, the karasuno relationships are complicated, you can't tell me this wouldn't happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-10
Updated: 2017-09-10
Packaged: 2018-12-26 02:04:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12049032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luca_kieran/pseuds/luca_kieran
Summary: Oikawa started it.Suga could have left it alone, when Oikawa called across the court to Iwaizumi that he loved him. But he looked so smug about it. And damn it, Suga was not about to be outdone. If he'd known the consequences beforehand, he might have kept his mouth shut. But also, maybe he wouldn't have.Or: the Karasuno team spend way too long telling each other how much they love each other, Tanaka and Noya have a 'lover's quarrel', Hinata tells everything to Kenma, and Kuroo is too curious for his own good.





	Distraction

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this sitting on my computer for weeks so I should probably post it whoops

It was all Oikawa’s fault.

It had started innocently enough. In the middle of the practice match Seijoh had asked for, Iwaizumi had subbed out for a possible injury. As he’d walked off the court, Oikawa had smiled coyly at his boyfriend, given a little wave, and called out, “I love you!”  
  
Iwaizumi rolled his eyes and gestured vaguely in Oikawa’s direction to indicate he’d heard. Oikawa pouted, a hand on his cocked hip, until his boyfriend sighed and from the sidelines, replied, “Love you too.”  
  
Oikawa’s smile could probably have been seen from space. The rest of the team huffed and shook their heads at his antics.

But on the other side of the net, Suga refused to be outdone.

Standing beside Takeda and Coach Ukai, he waved to catch Daichi’s attention. As soon as the captain glanced over, Suga grinned widely and called, “Love you baby!”  
  
Daichi stared for a moment, almost dropping the ball he was supposed to be serving. Then, with a slight blush, he smiled and said, “Love you too, Koushi.”  
  
Suga bit his lip, still grinning. He shot a look at Oikawa. The Seijoh captain met his gaze with an annoyed squint. Suga just winked and turned his attention back to the Karasuno side – in time to hear Hinata say brightly, “Tobio, I love you!”

Suga brought a hand to his mouth to hide his smile. _He’s such a precious child_. Kageyama stared at the eager-eyed redhead beside him. He flicked his gaze back to Daichi to see if he was going to serve, but the captain shrugged, using the ball to gesture in Hinata’s direction.  
  
Kageyama sighed, rolling his eyes. “I know.”  
  
Hinata’s face fell. He waited for a moment for him to say anything more, but Suga knew well that the emotionally-constipated setter was going to need some more encouragement. He opened his mouth to shout across the court, but Hinata spoke before he could.  
  
“Don’t you love me too?” he asked, eyes wide and brow creased.  
  
Kageyama stared at him again, this time even more confused. “Uh… yes? You know I do?”  
  
“Say it, Kageyama!” Suga yelled.  
  
The setter shot him a look, but sighed. Looking back to Hinata, he said, “I love you, idiot.”

Hinata’s grin rivalled that of Oikawa. Suga snuck another look across the net at the Seijoh captain. He was pouting now, tapping his foot impatiently. And then someone shifted in front of his view – Suga looked up to see Coach Ukai stepping forward. He started to speak, but Yamaguchi beat him to it. The usually-quiet boy shouted from the sidelines, “I love you, Tsukki!”  
  
Tsukki glanced at him and raised a hand in acknowledgment. It was enough for Yamaguchi, who smiled brightly and bounced on the balls of his feet.

“Right,” Ukai yelled. “Can we actually play some volleyball now? Or does anyone else need to declare their undying love for someone?”  
  
He was being sarcastic. Suga knew it. Suga knew Noya knew it. But standing beside him, the little libero smirked and raised a hand. “I do!” As Ukai groaned into his hand and Takeda patted him on the shoulder comfortingly, Noya shouted, “Asahi! I love you!”  
  
In the middle of the court, Asahi started in surprise. He blinked, uncomprehending, at his boyfriend. And then a heavy blush started to spread over his face and down his neck. He rubbed at the back of his neck, hunching his shoulders as he replied shyly, “I love you too, Noya.”  
  
Noya grinned. He waved, peering around Asahi. “And I love you too, Tanaka!”  
  
Tanaka whooped and threw his fists in the air. Suga rolled his eyes. Tanaka and Noya’s friendship often blurred some lines, but everyone was more than used to it by now.

“Sawamura! Serve the damn ball!”  
  
Suga snapped around to see who had spoken. One of the Seijoh boys – Kindaichi, he noted – glared through the net at the Karasuno team. Oikawa narrowed his eyes, staring at him from the back of the court. He started to scold him - “Kindaichi!” he shouted, both hands on his hips. But he didn’t have the chance to go any further; Noya decided now was the time to run out onto the court towards his boyfriend.

Suga stifled a grin as Noya skidded to a stop next to Asahi and posed himself perfectly – on the ball of one foot, the other kicked up behind him, hands clasped in front of him, head tilted and cheek exposed for the kiss he was clearly expecting. Ukai groaned a little more loudly than before. Asahi took a moment to realise what was going on – and as soon as he did, he bit his lip. His blush hadn’t entirely receded yet from Noya’s declaration, and it returned in full force as he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to the libero’s cheek. Noya beamed, but only for a second. Before Asahi could pull away, Noya grabbed his face and kissed him full on the mouth.

It was the briefest of kisses. As Hinata giggled and Tsukki rolled his eyes, Noya sprinted back to the sidelines, leaving Asahi a bright red, dazed mess.  
  
“Alright, that’s enough,” Takeda said good-naturedly. “Let’s actually play some –”  
  
“Hey!” Tanaka shouted. “Where’s my kiss?”  
  
Noya poked his tongue out. “I’m not kissing you!”  
  
Suga shot Ukai a look as Tanaka stepped out of formation to properly face his friend. The coach mumbled something about an early grave under his breath, scrubbing a hand over his face. For a moment, Suga felt bad. _This is kind of my fault_. But then, behind Ukai, he caught sight of Oikawa again. He smirked. _No, this is Oikawa’s fault_.  
  
“That’s not fair, how come Asahi gets a kiss and not me?” Tanaka pouted.  
  
Noya shot back, lightning fast, “Because I like kissing Asahi.”  
  
Tanaka folded his arms across his chest and, turning dramatically away from him, said, “How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me!”  
  
“Well, if you’re going to be like that,” Noya smirked “maybe we should see other people.”  
  
Tanaka gasped and whipped back around. “No way! You don’t get to dump me before I dump you!”

Everyone was staring now. Suga tore his eyes away from the scene unfolding in front of him long enough to glance at the other people in the gym. Those on the front row – Hinata, Kageyama, and Tsukki – all turned to watch the drama. Hinata’s eyes were wide while Kageyama frowned in confusion. Tsukki sighed heavily. Daichi looked he was tempted to intervene, but the tiny smile on his face made it clear he was too amused to really do anything. On the Seijoh side, the boys stared in shock. Oikawa raised an eyebrow. Resting on the sidelines, Iwaizumi shook his head almost in time with his coach. Takeda’s gaze flicked from Tanaka to Noya and back again, jaw hanging loose. Ukai stared at the ceiling, mouthing something silently to himself.

“I’ll just get myself a new best friend,” Tanaka announced. He scanned the group milling about on the sidelines. With a dramatic gesture, he pointed and declared, “Ennoshita, you’ll be my new best friend.”  
  
Suga looked over at the quiet wing spiker. Ennoshita shrugged. “If you like.”  
  
“Well,” Noya said, tossing his head. “I’ll find myself someone new too. Asahi! You can take Tanaka’s place!”  
  
Asahi jumped at the mention of his name. He blinked, a startled rabbit in the headlights. “W-we… we’ve been dating for six months…”  
  
His protest went mostly unheard – it was too quiet under Ukai’s booming shout, “That’s enough!” He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at each member of the team. “Let’s do what we came here to do, alright? I don’t want to hear any more damn lover’s quarrels. Sawamura, serve!”  
  
Daichi nodded and got himself into position. Tanaka stepped back into formation, but not before sticking his tongue out at Noya.

Suga sighed, shaking his head with a smile. The Seijoh team was scrambling to get themselves ready now, and he locked eyes with Oikawa. The captain pursed his lips thoughtfully before returning his attention to his team.

_He probably thinks I planned all that. It was a great distraction._ Suga mused. _I almost wish I had. I would never have been able to though. Planning anything outside of volleyball plays with this lot is like herding cats. But…_ Daichi served brilliantly, and the game resumed play. Suga smiled to himself. _That doesn’t change how much I love this team_.

* * *

Kuroo stretched his arms out in front of him, rolling his neck as he strolled into the gym. He was early for practice, so he wasn’t anticipating anyone else being there. But as he pulled the door shut behind him, he spotted a small figure sat on the floor in the far corner, hunched over and staring at something in their hands.  
  
“Kenma!” Kuroo smiled.  
  
Kenma didn’t react at first. After a moment, he glanced up quickly in acknowledgment before returning to the object he was holding. Kuroo sauntered over, swinging his arms in loose arcs.  
  
“Still trying to beat that level you couldn’t get through last night?” he asked as he approached.  
  
Kenma shook his head. “No, I did that this morning. I’m texting Shouyou.” He held his phone aloft for a second for Kuroo to see.  
  
Kuroo raised an eyebrow. “What do you two even talk about anyway? You’re not trading team secrets, are you?” he teased.  
  
Kenma flicked his gaze up to him. “No. He’s filling me in on the fight between Tanaka and Nishinoya.”

“Fight?” Kuroo dropped down in front of him. He leaned back on his hands and stretched his legs out, one on either side of Kenma. He had the extra space, after all, as Kenma had his feet crossed comfortably underneath him. _Maybe I should be keeping an eye on Karasuno’s relationships? It could be useful. If two of them are fighting, that could mean discord between the team as a whole._ Kenma shrugged, still typing as he spoke. “Not a real fight. It’s something they do sometimes.”  
  
Kuroo tilted his head. “Tell me about it. And the others too. What sort of relationships do they have?”  
  
Finally he got a sustained look from the boy. Kenma frowned, but shrugged again and said. “Alright, but it’s complicated.”  
  
“I think I can handle some team drama.”

Kenma took a deep breath.

Kuroo wasn’t prepared.

“Well, the issue with Tanaka and Nishinoya is that they had a fight at a practice match with Seijoh yesterday. Nishinoya gave Azumane a kiss during the match but not Tanaka. And that all started because Oikawa told Iwaizumi that he loved him when Iwaizumi was leaving the court because of injury, and then Sugawara told Sawamura that he loved him, which was when Shouyou decided that he wanted to tell Kageyama that he loved him too because everyone else was doing it and he thought it would be sweet, although Kageyama didn’t want to say it back to start with, but that’s because he has issues with showing his emotions, even in private, according to Shouyou. And then after that, Yamaguchi told Tsukishima that he loved him, which Shouyou thought was strange because they’re both usually very quiet about their relationship, but then after that Nishinoya told Azumane and Tanaka that he loved them, and gave Azumane a kiss, but not Tanaka. They had a fight about it on the court and Tanaka decided Ennoshita was going to be his new best friend and Nishinoya decided Azumane was going to be _his_ new best friend, even though they’ve been best friends for years and dating for six months. And that’s when their coach told them all to shut up and finish the match.”

Kuroo stared. _Not only was that the longest string of words he’s said in a long time, it’s also the most convoluted story I’ve ever heard._ “I’m… not entirely following. Is Nishinoya dating Tanaka or Azumane? Is he dating both of them? I thought you said it wasn’t a real fight. And… is _everyone_ dating someone else on the team?”  
  
Kenma sighed. “Nishinoya loves Azumane and Tanaka, but he’s dating Azumane. Sometimes Nishinoya and Tanaka have fights and break up but they’re just joking, they don’t really mean it.”  
  
“They break up? They’re in love, but not dating?”  
  
“They love each other. They’re not _in_ love. And yes, they broke up. Shouyou says they’ll be back together by the end of the week.”  
  
“So…” Kuroo stumbled, trying to keep up. “Who exactly is dating who?”

Kenma took another deep breath and immediately Kuroo regretted ever even considering learning more about the Karasuno team.

“Shouyou is dating Kageyama, although if you asked Kageyama he wouldn’t like to admit it, but that’s because it’s very new for him and like I said, he doesn’t know how to deal with his feelings. Shouyou says they’re working on that. Sawamura and Sugawara are married, although they had a really serious fight a few weeks ago about their plans for after the end of school, and apparently it came close to a divorce. But they had counselling with Ennoshita and they’re alright now. Speaking of Ennoshita, there’s a rumour floating around that he’s dating someone but no one knows who.”

Kuroo was tempted to tell Kenma to stop because his head was starting to spin, but he had the feeling that even if he did ask, Kenma wouldn’t listen. He was on a roll now and starting to get more animated as he spoke.

“Tsukishima and Yamaguchi are dating. They’re actually the second longest lasting relationship after Sawamura and Sugawara. They don’t talk about it much because they don’t like other people to know about their business but they’re doing alright. Obviously Azumane and Nishinoya are dating; they have been for six months. Tanaka and Nishinoya love each other and are essentially another relationship, although they’re in the midst of their fight. Shouyou also told me that he heard a rumour from Tanaka, who heard from Nishinoya, who heard from Azumane, who heard from Sugawara, who was told the whole thing by one of the managers, Yachi, that their coach and one of the other managers, Takeda, might be involved romantically, but Shouyou’s never actually seen anything happen. Also Yachi is desperately in love with the other female manager, Shimizu but Shimizu doesn’t know. Everyone on the team thinks it’s cute but Yachi’s sworn them all to secrecy.”

“Okay, okay,” Kuroo said, holding up a hand. “This is ridiculous. They can’t all be dating each other.”  
  
Kenma shrugged. “Half of us are.”  
  
“That’s not even close to the same!” Kuroo said, staring in disbelief. “Lev and Morisuke and you and me are not the entire team! Plus, you mentioned something about the managers and the coach?” He shook his head. “No way. Something weird is going on at Karasuno.”  
  
Kenma shrugged. “You asked.”  
  
“I won’t be making that mistake again.”  
  
Kenma looked back down at his phone, but Kuroo didn’t miss the tiny smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. He rolled his eyes and got to his feet. As the sound of the door being pulled opened and the chatter of their teammates echoed through the gym, Kuroo reached down and ruffled Kenma’s hair. Kenma smacked his hand away without looking.  
  
“Come on, let’s go,” he grinned.  
  
Kenma sighed before standing up. With a quick glance upwards, he gestured for Kuroo to lean down. Frowning, Kuroo did as he was asked – only for Kenma to grab his face and pull him in for a kiss. Kuroo froze for a few seconds, taken by surprise. And then, smirking, he started to kiss back.

It was at that exact moment that Kenma pulled back. He looked up at him innocently, eyes wide, and said quietly, “I love you.”  
  
Kuroo blinked, stuttered. “I… I love you too…”  
  
Kenma patted his cheek, that tiny smile still hiding at the corner of his lips. “Shouyou was right. It really is a good distraction.”  
  
“Wait… what?” Kuroo stumbled over his words. Kenma shook his head and started to walk away towards the gathered team that was watching with teasing grins. Kuroo straightened up and watched him, clamping a hand over his mouth to hide his surprised smile.  
  
_He’s going to be the death of me, I swear_. 

**Author's Note:**

> My first Haikyuu fic and also unbeta'd - if something's off then let me know, but be kind?


End file.
